Come and Knock at my Door

Unfortunately I’ve felt a desperate desire to write about this week’s happening. It just doesn’t get round my head that the world can be so cruel, so closed, so vulnerable and at the same time so blind, so narrow-minded, so narcissist. What am I talking about? Yesterday happened a terrorist attack in Barcelona, fifty meters away from where I work and very close to where I live. I was on my day off so I was at home. I was supposed to go out at the exact time of the incident, but for some reason I felt very tired all of a sudden and I decided to take a nap. Soon I woke up with some messages on my phone asking if I was ok. I didn’t know what my friends were talking about until I realized I could hear a lot of sirens and helicopters around my neighborhood.

I went online and everything was real; the images of my street, my work, my people. I’m not going to get into details, everyone knows what happened. I stayed hours locked down at home, on my own, talking to people about it and letting everybody know I was ok. I was trying to keep up to date with my work colleges that were still locked down at work with no prevision on when they would get to go home. My street was closed, police officers yelling to people so they would stop trying to go and see what everything was about. It wasn’t pretty, why would you want to try and see it?

And that’s why I’m writing today. When I woke up, I didn’t want to go to work, I didn’t want to walk through that street, I didn’t want to see it. I was already feeling it in my bones, why see it? It came to the moment I had to go out. First thing I noticed was the silence; even though the streets where filled with people, no one was talking. All around the Ramblas streets were blocked by police cars and police officers. Candles were lit all the way down. I saw some people gathered around some roses that were put on the road on a heart shape. I started to cry; the energy around there was immeasurable. I had to wipe my tears and get to work.

The restaurant was empty, everybody with their faces looking down. Not a smile, why would there be a smile?

Time for my break and I had to walk through the Ramblas down again. On my way back there were a lot of people just taking pictures; pictures of people praying, pictures of people lighting candles, pictures of the journalists that were filming. I got really upset. I just don’t understand how the human being became so blind that the only way they take all this tragedy in is registering a nation’s suffering and sending it on WhatsApp to someone across the globe to see how bad it is.

At work I found out that last night, the owner was even considering keeping the doors opened and making some money out of people’s desperation. The restaurant is fifty meters away from the terrorist attack, the police recommended that everywhere nearby should stay shut because they were looking for the murderer and even so my colleges almost had to stay open.

I just cannot understand people’s reaction to an atrocity that just happened and that has being happeing all around the globe. People have no filter, just for Instagram. People have no heart or compassion, all they want is to be the first to register a picture and have the biggest number of likes possible. And then we say there is no salvation, that is the end of the world and that violence is winning. Humanity is knocking at our doors and we are no letting it in. Instead, we are watching it all through an eight inches screen so that way we are safe right?